This chick is being honest. And it makes me sick. It makes her husband sick. It makes her family sick. It even makes the host sick. Not only can a chick be this cold but she'll reveal it all on national TV for the chance at winning cash. Not for cash, just the chance of winning cash. When I watched this I didn't know whether to laugh, throw up or do both simultaneously. This is very safe for work but if 2Pac were alive he, without a doubt, would call this bitch "scandalous".
What would you do if you were her husband? And how much cash did her ex get?
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
The Curse of the #1 Pick
Title links to the USA Today interview with Colts GM Bill Polian. He's a great interview because he's very direct and just not really a bullshitter by nature. (Note: Bullshitter is apparently in the dictionary because spellcheck was fine with it, but spellcheck is apparently not) It's short so read it, real quick.
Let's get down to how I feel about the #1 pick in the NFL Draft these days. It's a tremendous burden. When is the last time that it really worked out well for a team? The easy answer is 2004 when the Giants traded up to get Eli Manning. The actual cost for trading up (via San Diego) was Philip Rivers, Shawn Merriman and Nate Kaeding. Although the Chargers actually asked for Osi but Ernie Acorsi wouldn't give him up. 6 months ago this did not look like the Giants were gonna end up on the winning end of this deal. But ain't that a bitch, Eli just won the Super Bowl for the Giants. Believe it or not this marks the last time a team has traded up into or within the top 7 picks. Considering how well this has worked out for the Giants shouldn't this be happening more often now? The NFL is a copycat league right?
Ain't gonna happen. Well why not? Because the cost is prohibitive. Extremely prohibitive. You have to give up assets to trade up and then you have to pay the player you get like he's one of the 3 best at his position in the league immediately. There's a very good chance that this player will be the highest paid player on his team before he ever plays a single snap. Now how is that sane? No other sport even comes close to this. I just cannot see veterans in the locker room accepting this easily. All the way from the minimum salary guys to the superstars who now feel that they are underpaid. Unless the player you get is Tom Brady right from the jump things are gonna get worse before they get better. Plus the assets you give up are generally players who make less and later draft picks who also make less. This throws off the balance in a team's salary structure. Having a top 3 draft pick is the equivalent of spending in free agency the way the Redskins do every year. You just keep pushing off the salary cap disaster until one season it just can't be fixed and there's a mass exodus. Think about all the picks the Raiders have had since 2002. They got 2 extra 1st rounders and 2 extra 2nd rounders from Tampa for Gruden. The Raiders usually pick in the top 10 if not the top 5 these days. You know how much talent that should represent? But it doesn't. What happens is you have a right guard who makes $7 million a year and he's just an average player. You have a CB who makes much more than his much more talented teammate CB. You have a QB who makes more money than Tom Brady. The list goes on. It just doesn't work to pick high. But nobody will trade up to allow teams to trade back. So what do the Miami Dolphins do this April?
They basically have two options. They open up Pandora's Box by taking very little to trade down. If they traded down from say 1 to 7 and only got back a 2nd round pick this year it would be the end of Jimmy Johnson's little trade chart. This move would also be an open admission that the price of a top 5 draft pick is just too high to fathom. NFL agents will argue that they're clients should be paid like this because the NFL makes a shitload of money and their clients need to be protected from injury and/or extenuating circumstances. In other words if their client gets arrested or is a bust. But doesn't this sound suspiciously like NFL teams are required to pay players based on their play at the college level? The players can get insurance policies to help protect them from injuries. So basically teams should give these guys extra millions of dollars because they were great in college but that might not transfer to the NFL? Then you have guys picked in the 6th round who go on to be stars but they can't make shit until their 5th year really. Anyway, that's obviously how I feel about that.
The Dolphins do have another option. You have to figure that they have at least 5 players on their board that they really like but none worth of the first pick. There is no rule that says they have to pick first. There's a time limit on the picks. If you miss it you get skipped. Just ask the Vikings. So the Dolphins could just chill. 10 minutes passes and the Rams are up. Now the Rams have to make a decision. Technically they are making the #1 overall pick but their rookie salary pool was calculated assuming they would have the #2 overall pick. Plus do they have anybody on their draft board rated high enough to take #1 overall? So what if the Rams elected not to pick? Considering this round is now in primetime, Roger Goodell's head would explode. So that should help keep the ratings up. What if teams really did this? In reality it probably wouldn't work. It would make a statement but it wouldn't work. Say every team in the first round opted not to exercise a pick. All that would happen is the Dolphins would still pick first overall and teams would be going crazy trying to jump over each other. But I could argue for the Dolphins to not use the first pick. Even if the Rams passed at that point somebody would either trade up or get ready to pick first if it passed to them. Then the Dolphins could just back in line, get a player they would've taken first overall for half or maybe a third of the cost. You might not add any additional assets but you would get the player you wanted at a much more reasonable salary and you would be sending a message to players and agents that you are not to be taken lightly as an organization and you will stick to your principles. (See Patriots, New England)
Let's get down to how I feel about the #1 pick in the NFL Draft these days. It's a tremendous burden. When is the last time that it really worked out well for a team? The easy answer is 2004 when the Giants traded up to get Eli Manning. The actual cost for trading up (via San Diego) was Philip Rivers, Shawn Merriman and Nate Kaeding. Although the Chargers actually asked for Osi but Ernie Acorsi wouldn't give him up. 6 months ago this did not look like the Giants were gonna end up on the winning end of this deal. But ain't that a bitch, Eli just won the Super Bowl for the Giants. Believe it or not this marks the last time a team has traded up into or within the top 7 picks. Considering how well this has worked out for the Giants shouldn't this be happening more often now? The NFL is a copycat league right?
Ain't gonna happen. Well why not? Because the cost is prohibitive. Extremely prohibitive. You have to give up assets to trade up and then you have to pay the player you get like he's one of the 3 best at his position in the league immediately. There's a very good chance that this player will be the highest paid player on his team before he ever plays a single snap. Now how is that sane? No other sport even comes close to this. I just cannot see veterans in the locker room accepting this easily. All the way from the minimum salary guys to the superstars who now feel that they are underpaid. Unless the player you get is Tom Brady right from the jump things are gonna get worse before they get better. Plus the assets you give up are generally players who make less and later draft picks who also make less. This throws off the balance in a team's salary structure. Having a top 3 draft pick is the equivalent of spending in free agency the way the Redskins do every year. You just keep pushing off the salary cap disaster until one season it just can't be fixed and there's a mass exodus. Think about all the picks the Raiders have had since 2002. They got 2 extra 1st rounders and 2 extra 2nd rounders from Tampa for Gruden. The Raiders usually pick in the top 10 if not the top 5 these days. You know how much talent that should represent? But it doesn't. What happens is you have a right guard who makes $7 million a year and he's just an average player. You have a CB who makes much more than his much more talented teammate CB. You have a QB who makes more money than Tom Brady. The list goes on. It just doesn't work to pick high. But nobody will trade up to allow teams to trade back. So what do the Miami Dolphins do this April?
They basically have two options. They open up Pandora's Box by taking very little to trade down. If they traded down from say 1 to 7 and only got back a 2nd round pick this year it would be the end of Jimmy Johnson's little trade chart. This move would also be an open admission that the price of a top 5 draft pick is just too high to fathom. NFL agents will argue that they're clients should be paid like this because the NFL makes a shitload of money and their clients need to be protected from injury and/or extenuating circumstances. In other words if their client gets arrested or is a bust. But doesn't this sound suspiciously like NFL teams are required to pay players based on their play at the college level? The players can get insurance policies to help protect them from injuries. So basically teams should give these guys extra millions of dollars because they were great in college but that might not transfer to the NFL? Then you have guys picked in the 6th round who go on to be stars but they can't make shit until their 5th year really. Anyway, that's obviously how I feel about that.
The Dolphins do have another option. You have to figure that they have at least 5 players on their board that they really like but none worth of the first pick. There is no rule that says they have to pick first. There's a time limit on the picks. If you miss it you get skipped. Just ask the Vikings. So the Dolphins could just chill. 10 minutes passes and the Rams are up. Now the Rams have to make a decision. Technically they are making the #1 overall pick but their rookie salary pool was calculated assuming they would have the #2 overall pick. Plus do they have anybody on their draft board rated high enough to take #1 overall? So what if the Rams elected not to pick? Considering this round is now in primetime, Roger Goodell's head would explode. So that should help keep the ratings up. What if teams really did this? In reality it probably wouldn't work. It would make a statement but it wouldn't work. Say every team in the first round opted not to exercise a pick. All that would happen is the Dolphins would still pick first overall and teams would be going crazy trying to jump over each other. But I could argue for the Dolphins to not use the first pick. Even if the Rams passed at that point somebody would either trade up or get ready to pick first if it passed to them. Then the Dolphins could just back in line, get a player they would've taken first overall for half or maybe a third of the cost. You might not add any additional assets but you would get the player you wanted at a much more reasonable salary and you would be sending a message to players and agents that you are not to be taken lightly as an organization and you will stick to your principles. (See Patriots, New England)
Friday, February 22, 2008
NBA Trade Deadline Update (Everybody Loves LeBron)
Of course right after I finished my trade deadline bit yesterday LeBron got his wish half-granted. He wanted a play-making point guard. He got four solid-to-decent rotation players, including one with some Finals experience. In case you live in a cave the Cavs got Ben Wallace, Joe Smith, Delonte West and Wally World. That might not sound great but they were acquired for Larry Hughes, Drew Gooden and belly button lint. Yes the Cavs added salary but none past two seasons from now, which, incidentally, is when LeBron becomes a free agent. So they added for now without cramping their long-term plans. Larry Hughes has his own horrible contract (Danny Ferry - 5 years $60 for Hughes? Seriously? Did Billy King help you on that deal? We're y'all working off of Kenny Thomas' contract? The fuck?) and Drew Gooden was gonna need a new contract this summer. Got that?
While I don't think the Cavs added the point guard they needed or the secondary scorer that they needed but they got 4 useful players while giving up only two and not surrendering any first round picks. That's good enough for me but I suspect in the grand scheme of things, it won't be enough to win. Especially now that Daniel Gibson (Boobie!) is gonna miss the dreaded 4-6 weeks with a bad-ass ankle sprain. Wally World welcome back to the pressure cooker. Playing the role of Kevin Garnett will be LeBron James. The 8 o'clock show is always different than the 3 o'clock show so make sure you tune in for both.
The other couple of deadline deals amount to the usual trading of spare parts. Although the Rockets did get Gerald Green on the cheap. I'm just not sure that his athleticism is ever gonna translate to basketball skills. The problem is somebody will throw some millions at him anyways and he'll never learn.
At the end of the day it's the same story for me. From the jump I liked the Pistons and Spurs. I'm not gonna back down now. The Pistons need to avoid the Cavs and the Spurs need to avoid the Lakers. Although those would be some great games to watch. I'm not gonna make full predictions now or anything but we will roll with the Pistons and the Spurs still.
Check out John Hollinger's breakdown of the trades at the deadline. He does some excellent work for the Worldwide Leader.
While I don't think the Cavs added the point guard they needed or the secondary scorer that they needed but they got 4 useful players while giving up only two and not surrendering any first round picks. That's good enough for me but I suspect in the grand scheme of things, it won't be enough to win. Especially now that Daniel Gibson (Boobie!) is gonna miss the dreaded 4-6 weeks with a bad-ass ankle sprain. Wally World welcome back to the pressure cooker. Playing the role of Kevin Garnett will be LeBron James. The 8 o'clock show is always different than the 3 o'clock show so make sure you tune in for both.
The other couple of deadline deals amount to the usual trading of spare parts. Although the Rockets did get Gerald Green on the cheap. I'm just not sure that his athleticism is ever gonna translate to basketball skills. The problem is somebody will throw some millions at him anyways and he'll never learn.
At the end of the day it's the same story for me. From the jump I liked the Pistons and Spurs. I'm not gonna back down now. The Pistons need to avoid the Cavs and the Spurs need to avoid the Lakers. Although those would be some great games to watch. I'm not gonna make full predictions now or anything but we will roll with the Pistons and the Spurs still.
Check out John Hollinger's breakdown of the trades at the deadline. He does some excellent work for the Worldwide Leader.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
The NBA Trade Deadline
Click on the title to go over to The Worldwide Leader's up to the minute coverage of the NBA trade deadline. They event had a "Sportscenter Special" from 2-3 ET. Trades can come in late because they have to be submitted by 3 PM ET but sometimes the approval process can take awhile. Any who, there have been no blockbusters today. The Spurs acquired Kurt Thomas from the Sonics last night and the Hornets and Rockets traded spare parts today. So we're ready to break down our winners and losers for the trade deadline.
WINNERS
Lakers - Everybody knows they stole Pau Gasol and gave up nothing. But giving up first round picks always catches up with you. But the price was right for this one. If they don't make the conference finals it's because of injuries.
Hawks - Mike Bibby might not be a franchise player but the Hawks needed a point guard, a veteran starter and somebody with playoff experience. Bibby fits all those needs and they got him for nothing. Too bad they gave up way too much for Joe Johnson but what the hell.
Spurs - Kurt Thomas might not be exactly what the doctor ordered but given the Spurs track record I'll go ahead and say that he'll work out great. Again, the Spurs basically gave up a first round pick for him. He's got an expiring contract so he's an expensive level but he offers veteran production for the playoffs and cap relief after.
Suns - This was a tough call to make but I looking at it from the perspective that they were gonna lose Marion for nothing after this season or next and they managed to dump Marcus Banks and his contract. Plus I think Shaq gives them a dimension they sorely lacked as well as leadership, confidence and Finals experience. If they could just swing a trade for Ron Artest they'd be significantly better.
Sonics - Because of the way they acquired and traded away Kurt Thomas they acquired 3 extra first round picks and added zero salary obligation past this season. Outstanding.
Miami - It ain't perfect but they managed to move Shaq. Marion is an asset either as a player, trade bait or cap relief. Marcus Banks, once upon a time, scored a whole bunch of points playing for a bad Minnesota team. The Heat need to make some other deals though or D-Wade will walk in two years.
LOSERS
Dallas - Yes they got Jason Kidd. But it cost them about $18 million, their second best big man, 2 first round picks, and their point guard of the future, who also happened to be their best young player and best defender. Even if they win a championship they're gonna end up just like the Heat in two years.
Cleveland - King James is walking in 2 years. They have way too many bad contracts. Something has to give.
Sacramento - They're on this losers side strictly because they failed to use Bibby or Artest to move Kenny Thomas and his albatross of a contract. And they didn't get a first round pick for Bibby. The going rate these days is 2 first round picks.
Minnesota - You ain't attracting any free agents. You couldn't do that when you had KG. Walker, Jaric and Gerald Green all want out and have some value. And they have Ratliff's humongous expiring deal. Y'all should've done SOMETHING. Expect season ticket renewals to drop. Again.
Philadelphia - Decide if you're building or making a playoff run. Iguodala is going to get paid and soon. There goes all of your precious cap room. If they do trade Andre Miller they have to move Willie Green and/or Reggie Evans and their contracts to actually have cap room after signing AI2. Needless to say trade Dalembert as well but who wants him and his deal. How bad does Indy want to move Jermaine O'Neal. Speaking of.....
Indiana - Shit or get off the pot Larry Bird. Trade Tinsley and O'Neal an blow it up or try to move a couple of pieces around and make 1 last run with them. Just pick one and do it.
Clippers - Why can I believe that they'll just let everybody jump shit next year and reap the cash savings and luxury tax checks. Cassell is a free agent, Maggette is gonna opt out and most likely so will Elton Brand. But they already have Kaman, Mobley and Tim Thomas who all have big deals and they have to re-sign Shaun Livingston (good luck with that problem) so they're not going to be flush with cap space anyway. In other words they should have used Cassell and/or Maggette to move Thomas and/or Mobley.
Knicks - Isiah this was the one time you were actually supposed to make a deal. Anything is better than what you've got. Everybody should be on the block. If you're willing to take back some more bad contracts the stars can come back to MSG.
Bucks - Same deal as the Knicks basically. They have a whole bunch of overpaid players who play the same positions and have similar skills. Move some of them, somewhere, somehow.
Toronto - They needed to make some kind of move to give them the ability to hang with the Pistons or Celtics come playoff time. They didn't do it.
Orlando - Yet another team in the East that needed one more piece. And Orlando had the goods to do it with a boatload of expiring deals. You can't use the high dive if you're scared to jump into the deep end fellas.
Chicago - Are they really going to pay Deng and Gordon? If they can't win now does Wallace (Ben) have any value to them? They went in the loser column last year when they had pieces people wanted and they stood pat. Now nobody wants their pieces, partially because they might just be able to sign them as free agents soon. Y'all blew it Chicago, fucking Kobe was a pipe dream and y'all bought it. Although it is kind of amazing how much Memphis wanted from Chicago for Gasol and what they ultimately got for him from the Lakers. Credit Jerry West with the assist.
Memphis - They're on the losers side because I don't think that they're gonna spend very much of this cap room they're accumulating. And they backed down off of making whoever got Gasol take Brian Cardinal and his contract. If you're gonna have a fire-sale remember, everything must go.
Charlotte - This team is fatally flawed. They don't really have any assets that anybody wants and they show no signs of developing into a playoff caliber team. So be it I guess, but shouldn't they have tried something? Feels like the NBA will be leaving Charlotte for a second time at this rate.
Denver - You already have the 3rd highest payroll, a crazy coach and the original AI. Camby and Martin are relatively healthy so this is your best shot. They'll end up regretting not making a move when they get bounced in the first round. Again. If they make the playoffs.
Warriors - Your big move was signing Chris Webber? That won't get it done. Why didn't they make an inquiry about Shaq? You could argue they need him for the same reason the Suns did.
INCOMPLETE, N/A or NOT NEEDED
Detroit - Don't mess with success and try to avoid LeBron in the playoffs.
New Jersey - The Kidd deal was great but this is an incomplete until the move Vince Carter.
Boston - Same as Detroit plus they really don't have anything else to trade away.
Washington - With all of their injuries it was impossible for them to make any kind of a good deal.
Utah - They already made their deal when they got Korver.
Portland - No deal worth making until next year.
Houston & New Orleans - They traded spare parts which is about all these teams can do, they really don't have any assets that they would part with that anybody else would want.
Wow I wasn't actually going to go over every team but what the hell. Updates coming later tonight when the dust settles.
WINNERS
Lakers - Everybody knows they stole Pau Gasol and gave up nothing. But giving up first round picks always catches up with you. But the price was right for this one. If they don't make the conference finals it's because of injuries.
Hawks - Mike Bibby might not be a franchise player but the Hawks needed a point guard, a veteran starter and somebody with playoff experience. Bibby fits all those needs and they got him for nothing. Too bad they gave up way too much for Joe Johnson but what the hell.
Spurs - Kurt Thomas might not be exactly what the doctor ordered but given the Spurs track record I'll go ahead and say that he'll work out great. Again, the Spurs basically gave up a first round pick for him. He's got an expiring contract so he's an expensive level but he offers veteran production for the playoffs and cap relief after.
Suns - This was a tough call to make but I looking at it from the perspective that they were gonna lose Marion for nothing after this season or next and they managed to dump Marcus Banks and his contract. Plus I think Shaq gives them a dimension they sorely lacked as well as leadership, confidence and Finals experience. If they could just swing a trade for Ron Artest they'd be significantly better.
Sonics - Because of the way they acquired and traded away Kurt Thomas they acquired 3 extra first round picks and added zero salary obligation past this season. Outstanding.
Miami - It ain't perfect but they managed to move Shaq. Marion is an asset either as a player, trade bait or cap relief. Marcus Banks, once upon a time, scored a whole bunch of points playing for a bad Minnesota team. The Heat need to make some other deals though or D-Wade will walk in two years.
LOSERS
Dallas - Yes they got Jason Kidd. But it cost them about $18 million, their second best big man, 2 first round picks, and their point guard of the future, who also happened to be their best young player and best defender. Even if they win a championship they're gonna end up just like the Heat in two years.
Cleveland - King James is walking in 2 years. They have way too many bad contracts. Something has to give.
Sacramento - They're on this losers side strictly because they failed to use Bibby or Artest to move Kenny Thomas and his albatross of a contract. And they didn't get a first round pick for Bibby. The going rate these days is 2 first round picks.
Minnesota - You ain't attracting any free agents. You couldn't do that when you had KG. Walker, Jaric and Gerald Green all want out and have some value. And they have Ratliff's humongous expiring deal. Y'all should've done SOMETHING. Expect season ticket renewals to drop. Again.
Philadelphia - Decide if you're building or making a playoff run. Iguodala is going to get paid and soon. There goes all of your precious cap room. If they do trade Andre Miller they have to move Willie Green and/or Reggie Evans and their contracts to actually have cap room after signing AI2. Needless to say trade Dalembert as well but who wants him and his deal. How bad does Indy want to move Jermaine O'Neal. Speaking of.....
Indiana - Shit or get off the pot Larry Bird. Trade Tinsley and O'Neal an blow it up or try to move a couple of pieces around and make 1 last run with them. Just pick one and do it.
Clippers - Why can I believe that they'll just let everybody jump shit next year and reap the cash savings and luxury tax checks. Cassell is a free agent, Maggette is gonna opt out and most likely so will Elton Brand. But they already have Kaman, Mobley and Tim Thomas who all have big deals and they have to re-sign Shaun Livingston (good luck with that problem) so they're not going to be flush with cap space anyway. In other words they should have used Cassell and/or Maggette to move Thomas and/or Mobley.
Knicks - Isiah this was the one time you were actually supposed to make a deal. Anything is better than what you've got. Everybody should be on the block. If you're willing to take back some more bad contracts the stars can come back to MSG.
Bucks - Same deal as the Knicks basically. They have a whole bunch of overpaid players who play the same positions and have similar skills. Move some of them, somewhere, somehow.
Toronto - They needed to make some kind of move to give them the ability to hang with the Pistons or Celtics come playoff time. They didn't do it.
Orlando - Yet another team in the East that needed one more piece. And Orlando had the goods to do it with a boatload of expiring deals. You can't use the high dive if you're scared to jump into the deep end fellas.
Chicago - Are they really going to pay Deng and Gordon? If they can't win now does Wallace (Ben) have any value to them? They went in the loser column last year when they had pieces people wanted and they stood pat. Now nobody wants their pieces, partially because they might just be able to sign them as free agents soon. Y'all blew it Chicago, fucking Kobe was a pipe dream and y'all bought it. Although it is kind of amazing how much Memphis wanted from Chicago for Gasol and what they ultimately got for him from the Lakers. Credit Jerry West with the assist.
Memphis - They're on the losers side because I don't think that they're gonna spend very much of this cap room they're accumulating. And they backed down off of making whoever got Gasol take Brian Cardinal and his contract. If you're gonna have a fire-sale remember, everything must go.
Charlotte - This team is fatally flawed. They don't really have any assets that anybody wants and they show no signs of developing into a playoff caliber team. So be it I guess, but shouldn't they have tried something? Feels like the NBA will be leaving Charlotte for a second time at this rate.
Denver - You already have the 3rd highest payroll, a crazy coach and the original AI. Camby and Martin are relatively healthy so this is your best shot. They'll end up regretting not making a move when they get bounced in the first round. Again. If they make the playoffs.
Warriors - Your big move was signing Chris Webber? That won't get it done. Why didn't they make an inquiry about Shaq? You could argue they need him for the same reason the Suns did.
INCOMPLETE, N/A or NOT NEEDED
Detroit - Don't mess with success and try to avoid LeBron in the playoffs.
New Jersey - The Kidd deal was great but this is an incomplete until the move Vince Carter.
Boston - Same as Detroit plus they really don't have anything else to trade away.
Washington - With all of their injuries it was impossible for them to make any kind of a good deal.
Utah - They already made their deal when they got Korver.
Portland - No deal worth making until next year.
Houston & New Orleans - They traded spare parts which is about all these teams can do, they really don't have any assets that they would part with that anybody else would want.
Wow I wasn't actually going to go over every team but what the hell. Updates coming later tonight when the dust settles.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Lindsay Lohan Topless
You'd think this was the greatest thing to happen in the history of the Internet. They have the Internet on computers now? Click the title to see Lohan's funbags. Every other site or blog on the planet has linked to them somewhere so I figured I'd be cool like everybody else. Just like smoking or calling somebody when you see that everybody else is on the phone. You're cool.
The Legend of the NBA Salary Cap
Mike Celizic wrote a nice piece for NBC Sports about the NBA salary cap. He raised some excellent points. I've always had conflicted feelings about the NBA salary structure. Before I start to talk shit I do want to say one thing. I love the NBA's draft system and rookie salary structure. This is the one area that the NBA laps the NFL and everybody else. The NBA Draft Lottery affords for a great deal of excitement because a shitty team can leapfrog an even shittier team. When most impact players in NBA drafts are found in the top 10 picks or so that's huge. The draft itself runs very quickly and doesn't feel nearly as drawn out as the NFL draft or as irrelevant as the NHL or MLB drafts. The way that they structure and slot their draft picks' salaries is brilliant. It makes it so easy to sign your young players and there is no acrimony between players, teams and agents. I'll give you two great examples. A couple years ago the Houston Texans took Mario Williams #1 in the NFL draft over the much more heralded Reggie Bush and Vince Young. The Texans gave all sorts of reasons but the #1 reason was that the agents for Bush and Young wanted quite a bit more money than Williams wanted. Considering your going to pay a guy like an all-pro when he's never played a snap, that's a big deal. If the #1 pick got a set amount they would've taken Bush. Now lets hop into our Delorean and go back another couple years. Some guy named LeBron James was coming into the NBA. With their salary structure system the negotiations between the #1 pick James and the Cleveland Cavaliers took less than a half hour. Imagine if the NBA was like the NFL and the #1 pick could ask for whatever he wanted. Would anybody beside the Knicks or the Lakers really have been able to afford LeBron? He could've asked for $200 million or something outrageous. And somebody (looking at you Isiah) would've paid it. See NBA people, I just said a whole bunch of nice things about y'all. You can stop reading now NBA people. Oh fuck it, haters keep reading.
The NBA salary cap is fucked. The main reason that I've always hated it is that there only seems to be 1 or 2 (3 at the most) teams with cap room any given summer. That means that top free agents have a very limited number of landing spots. Most of the time they'll re-up with their own team or try to force a sign-and-trade to a team that's over the cap. The teams with cap room are not elite teams. When they can't sign a top-level or even just plain good free agent, they panic. The fans start bitching, nobody's renewing their season tickets and it's a horrible situation. Then they sign players to incredibly overpriced contracts and those contracts hamstring them for 5 years. There's just never enough free agents and enough teams bidding for them. Just look at Rashard Lewis last year. He's a good player but right now he's 3rd best on his own team. He should've gotten about 5 years $50-$60 million. He got twice that. Do you really have cap room if you have nobody to spend it on?
Let's talk about the mid-level exception. Basically, any team over the salary cap gets 1 exception every year. Lately it's been for roughly $5 million per year. This is what allows Isiah Thomas to go out and sign somebody to a 5 year $25 million deal every season. Even though the Knicks payroll is roughly twice the limit of the "salary cap". When used correctly (see Spurs, San Antonio) it can help an elite veteran team add a bench player or two to make their run that year. But for the most part it just exists so that teams over the cap can sign SOMEBODY just so their fans don't revolt. If teams over the cap couldn't sign anything other than minimum salary players you would have teams that had the same personnel for several years no matter how bad they are. The fans would not like that. At least when they sign somebody for $5 mil they can point at him and tell the fans that he's the piece that's gonna put them over the top. The only recent exceptions to this rule that I can think of (exceptions meaning the guy was actually good) are Chauncey Billups to the Pistons, Hedo Turkoglu to the Magic and Stephen Jackson to Spurs. That's not a lot of success overall. The mid-level exception is just giving teams more rope to hang themselves with.
The luxury tax. How aptly named it is. In the NBA it's considered a luxury to have good team. In recent memory only the Pistons and the Spurs have had sustained success while remaining under the luxury tax threshold. These days you need three All-Star caliber players to win a title. All-Star caliber generally equals $10 million plus per year. So that's 3 guys for $30-$40 million. That's a lot of your cap room. In order to get 2 more quality starters and good bench depth you're going to have to dip into tax territory. So be it right. The thing with the tax is that if your over it you're basically acting like a porno whore and getting doubly penetrated. When you're over the tax line you write a check for every $1 that your over it. So if the line is $65 million and your payroll is $95 million you write a check for $30 million. All of this money is put into a pool and divided amongst all of the teams who are under the tax line. Imagine going over the tax line by a dollar. By being under the line you might be in line for a check for say $5 million. But you go over by $1 and instead you have to write a check for a dollar. That $1 actually cost you $5,000,001. Now imagine you're $1 million under the tax line. Somebody on your teams gets hurt and you sign a player for your mid-level exception of $5 million. So you just went from $1 million under the tax line to $4 million over it. Say you got $5 million for being under the tax line. Before you were in line to receive $5 million. You will now have to pay the $5 million for the contact, $4 million for being over the luxury tax and you will no longer receive the $5 million for being under the tax line. That player's actual cost to your team was $14 million dollars. Ain't that a bitch.
Click on the title for the link to Mike Celizic's article, it's a good read.
The NBA salary cap is fucked. The main reason that I've always hated it is that there only seems to be 1 or 2 (3 at the most) teams with cap room any given summer. That means that top free agents have a very limited number of landing spots. Most of the time they'll re-up with their own team or try to force a sign-and-trade to a team that's over the cap. The teams with cap room are not elite teams. When they can't sign a top-level or even just plain good free agent, they panic. The fans start bitching, nobody's renewing their season tickets and it's a horrible situation. Then they sign players to incredibly overpriced contracts and those contracts hamstring them for 5 years. There's just never enough free agents and enough teams bidding for them. Just look at Rashard Lewis last year. He's a good player but right now he's 3rd best on his own team. He should've gotten about 5 years $50-$60 million. He got twice that. Do you really have cap room if you have nobody to spend it on?
Let's talk about the mid-level exception. Basically, any team over the salary cap gets 1 exception every year. Lately it's been for roughly $5 million per year. This is what allows Isiah Thomas to go out and sign somebody to a 5 year $25 million deal every season. Even though the Knicks payroll is roughly twice the limit of the "salary cap". When used correctly (see Spurs, San Antonio) it can help an elite veteran team add a bench player or two to make their run that year. But for the most part it just exists so that teams over the cap can sign SOMEBODY just so their fans don't revolt. If teams over the cap couldn't sign anything other than minimum salary players you would have teams that had the same personnel for several years no matter how bad they are. The fans would not like that. At least when they sign somebody for $5 mil they can point at him and tell the fans that he's the piece that's gonna put them over the top. The only recent exceptions to this rule that I can think of (exceptions meaning the guy was actually good) are Chauncey Billups to the Pistons, Hedo Turkoglu to the Magic and Stephen Jackson to Spurs. That's not a lot of success overall. The mid-level exception is just giving teams more rope to hang themselves with.
The luxury tax. How aptly named it is. In the NBA it's considered a luxury to have good team. In recent memory only the Pistons and the Spurs have had sustained success while remaining under the luxury tax threshold. These days you need three All-Star caliber players to win a title. All-Star caliber generally equals $10 million plus per year. So that's 3 guys for $30-$40 million. That's a lot of your cap room. In order to get 2 more quality starters and good bench depth you're going to have to dip into tax territory. So be it right. The thing with the tax is that if your over it you're basically acting like a porno whore and getting doubly penetrated. When you're over the tax line you write a check for every $1 that your over it. So if the line is $65 million and your payroll is $95 million you write a check for $30 million. All of this money is put into a pool and divided amongst all of the teams who are under the tax line. Imagine going over the tax line by a dollar. By being under the line you might be in line for a check for say $5 million. But you go over by $1 and instead you have to write a check for a dollar. That $1 actually cost you $5,000,001. Now imagine you're $1 million under the tax line. Somebody on your teams gets hurt and you sign a player for your mid-level exception of $5 million. So you just went from $1 million under the tax line to $4 million over it. Say you got $5 million for being under the tax line. Before you were in line to receive $5 million. You will now have to pay the $5 million for the contact, $4 million for being over the luxury tax and you will no longer receive the $5 million for being under the tax line. That player's actual cost to your team was $14 million dollars. Ain't that a bitch.
Click on the title for the link to Mike Celizic's article, it's a good read.
Monday, February 18, 2008
Trophy In The Streets
When you brag that you already won your fantasy football league after Week 2 people get pissed. When that team ends up finishing in last place people get even. Or at least just act like dicks.
Something
Dwight Howard is Superman
I guess that I'll start with the dunk contest. Wow. That was the best dunk contest I remember since Vince Carter blew it up over half a decade ago. But that was just one man going crazy. These guys kept trying to top each other. I really liked Rudy Gay going into the contest but he and Jamario Moon both got off to slow starts and that killed their chances. Moon was guilty of hubris for putting a piece of tape over a foot above the foul line and then dunking from several feet inside of the foul line. Bad form indeed. I loved the theatrics of the contest this year. Costumes, props, ladders, you name it and they were pulling it out. (That's what she said) I was waiting for somebody to pull their Escalalde onto the court and Dwight Howard to dunk over it. I also did like Gerald Green's "Cupcake Dunk" which looked incredibly better in slow-motion replay. That was original and difficult. Howard's "Superman Dunk" wasn't the best I've ever seen (or even his 2nd best of the evening maybe) but the contest, the atmosphere, it was just a fucking frenzy. He took off closer than he wanted to and actually never even grabbed the rim but it didn't matter. David Stern take note: this was good but it could be better. Let them raise the rim as high as they want. Please.
Jason Kidd is going to Dallas. Or is he? Haven't we been down this road before. It seems that both parties have to get this done now, it's beyond the point of no return. I'm not really sure how I feel about this trade but I guess that I'll try to articulate some thoughts.
-Jason Kidd has plenty of playoff and Finals experience as a team leader. He led though Nets teams as well as anybody in the league could've and this will allow Dirk to be a very nice complimentary player along with Josh Howard. This will give the Mavericks their much needed vocal and locker room leader and will help them get through tough patches and win tightly contested road games in May.
-The Mavericks should not extend Kidd before this season is over. If this doesn't work (Read: No Finals appearance or title) they will need Kidd's expiring contract ($20 million) to correct this mistake. The Mavs aren't giving up any incredibly crucial pieces but they are going to be way into the luxury tax, they traded away their best player and point guard for the next decade and they traded away 2 first round picks. Even if they get 2 good seasons out of Kidd they're going to be right back in the market for a point guard that they traded away.
-I don't think the Mavericks did the wrong thing by making this trade. I don't think they could've made it out of the West as they were BKP2 (Before Kidd Part 2).
-I would've liked this deal a lot more for the Nets if they would've not re-signed Vince Carter this summer. Maybe they can turn it around on the fly. They really only traded away 1 rotation player (Kidd) and they got an adequate replacement for him in Harris. With two first round picks this summer (their own being a potential lottery pick) and some solid 1st and 2nd year players maybe they can become the East Coast Blazers.
I grade this deal as a draw. Dallas needed a playoff warrior and the Nets needed to move Kidd while they could. This is a deal made out of necessity, not chance or convenience.
Here is the new breakdown on the Kidd deal. And I thought I was done with Keith Van Horn after he was shipped out of Philly. Hell, I bet the Nets finally thought they were done with him too.
Why wasn't Kyle Korver in the 3 point contest? Really?
I still can't believe that the Hawks passed on Chris Paul and Deron Williams. Which leads he too:
The Atlanta Hawks traded for Mike Bibby and his huge salary. And they didn't give up 2 first round picks. They didn't give up 1 first round pick. They didn't have to take on any bad contracts (Kenny Thomas, I'm looking at your horrible deal, courtesy of Billy King) and they didn't have to give up any player they were really counting on getting anything from after this season. In other words they hit a home run. You've got to feel it for the Kings, there's not a lot of trade partners with compatible contracts right now. (Hello Cleveland and Larry Hughes, Eric Snow, Ira Newble, Damon Jones and others) So the Kings made the best deal they thought that they could. Although I personally would've taken a run at the Miami Heat and their expiring contracts. Of you might've been able to combine Bibby, Artest and Kenny Thomas and raped Isiah Thomas for something. I'm sure you could've gotten a couple young kids, cap relief after next season and 2-4 first round picks. I mean, if Eddy Curry was worth two first rounders, the fuck?
-Atlanta Hawks. Good for you. Too bad you'll just miss out on that #8 seed to the 76er's. You heard it here first.
-Sacramento Kings. If you managed to trade Chris Webber and his knees, Kenny Thomas should be a walk in the park. And deal Artest now for whatever you can get. Trust me.
Click here for the details on the Mike Bibby deal.
I guess that I'll start with the dunk contest. Wow. That was the best dunk contest I remember since Vince Carter blew it up over half a decade ago. But that was just one man going crazy. These guys kept trying to top each other. I really liked Rudy Gay going into the contest but he and Jamario Moon both got off to slow starts and that killed their chances. Moon was guilty of hubris for putting a piece of tape over a foot above the foul line and then dunking from several feet inside of the foul line. Bad form indeed. I loved the theatrics of the contest this year. Costumes, props, ladders, you name it and they were pulling it out. (That's what she said) I was waiting for somebody to pull their Escalalde onto the court and Dwight Howard to dunk over it. I also did like Gerald Green's "Cupcake Dunk" which looked incredibly better in slow-motion replay. That was original and difficult. Howard's "Superman Dunk" wasn't the best I've ever seen (or even his 2nd best of the evening maybe) but the contest, the atmosphere, it was just a fucking frenzy. He took off closer than he wanted to and actually never even grabbed the rim but it didn't matter. David Stern take note: this was good but it could be better. Let them raise the rim as high as they want. Please.
Jason Kidd is going to Dallas. Or is he? Haven't we been down this road before. It seems that both parties have to get this done now, it's beyond the point of no return. I'm not really sure how I feel about this trade but I guess that I'll try to articulate some thoughts.
-Jason Kidd has plenty of playoff and Finals experience as a team leader. He led though Nets teams as well as anybody in the league could've and this will allow Dirk to be a very nice complimentary player along with Josh Howard. This will give the Mavericks their much needed vocal and locker room leader and will help them get through tough patches and win tightly contested road games in May.
-The Mavericks should not extend Kidd before this season is over. If this doesn't work (Read: No Finals appearance or title) they will need Kidd's expiring contract ($20 million) to correct this mistake. The Mavs aren't giving up any incredibly crucial pieces but they are going to be way into the luxury tax, they traded away their best player and point guard for the next decade and they traded away 2 first round picks. Even if they get 2 good seasons out of Kidd they're going to be right back in the market for a point guard that they traded away.
-I don't think the Mavericks did the wrong thing by making this trade. I don't think they could've made it out of the West as they were BKP2 (Before Kidd Part 2).
-I would've liked this deal a lot more for the Nets if they would've not re-signed Vince Carter this summer. Maybe they can turn it around on the fly. They really only traded away 1 rotation player (Kidd) and they got an adequate replacement for him in Harris. With two first round picks this summer (their own being a potential lottery pick) and some solid 1st and 2nd year players maybe they can become the East Coast Blazers.
I grade this deal as a draw. Dallas needed a playoff warrior and the Nets needed to move Kidd while they could. This is a deal made out of necessity, not chance or convenience.
Here is the new breakdown on the Kidd deal. And I thought I was done with Keith Van Horn after he was shipped out of Philly. Hell, I bet the Nets finally thought they were done with him too.
Why wasn't Kyle Korver in the 3 point contest? Really?
I still can't believe that the Hawks passed on Chris Paul and Deron Williams. Which leads he too:
The Atlanta Hawks traded for Mike Bibby and his huge salary. And they didn't give up 2 first round picks. They didn't give up 1 first round pick. They didn't have to take on any bad contracts (Kenny Thomas, I'm looking at your horrible deal, courtesy of Billy King) and they didn't have to give up any player they were really counting on getting anything from after this season. In other words they hit a home run. You've got to feel it for the Kings, there's not a lot of trade partners with compatible contracts right now. (Hello Cleveland and Larry Hughes, Eric Snow, Ira Newble, Damon Jones and others) So the Kings made the best deal they thought that they could. Although I personally would've taken a run at the Miami Heat and their expiring contracts. Of you might've been able to combine Bibby, Artest and Kenny Thomas and raped Isiah Thomas for something. I'm sure you could've gotten a couple young kids, cap relief after next season and 2-4 first round picks. I mean, if Eddy Curry was worth two first rounders, the fuck?
-Atlanta Hawks. Good for you. Too bad you'll just miss out on that #8 seed to the 76er's. You heard it here first.
-Sacramento Kings. If you managed to trade Chris Webber and his knees, Kenny Thomas should be a walk in the park. And deal Artest now for whatever you can get. Trust me.
Click here for the details on the Mike Bibby deal.
Friday, February 15, 2008
I got nothing
About to go hit up happy hour and there's little reason to be happy. This might be the single worst day for sports viewing of the year. No NBA, 2 college games, very little NHL action, no baseball, no football, fucking nothing. What am I supposed to watch at the bar? None of these bars seem to have ESPN Classic either. Classic is mosdef my favorite ESPN station at the moment. I actually listened to Sportscenter on my Sirius yesterday and I almost liked it more than watching the TV broadcast. And having no video made it harder to tell when the anchors were fucking up. I guess I'll shoot pool. Although they have those touch-screen games on the bar. Those things are addicting. And expensive. And how. I'll spend more in those things than I will on beer. My moms wanted one of those things, they're like $4800 for a new one. 2 grand easy for a used one. Fuck that. In the words of the immortal Dars (The Disease) "kill yourself". That should about sum up the evening.
People still watch boxing?
Where have you gone Mike Tyson?
Do you realize that they still do all this boxing shit on pay-per-view? Taylor vs. Pavlik is tomorrow night and I could care less. I remember being younger and fight night was fucking fantastic. In college we'd play cards, drink, smoke cigars and watch the fight on our very inexpensive viewing box. (Read: Black Box Cable) People knew the guys fighting and who they'd fought recently. There was genuine excitement during the undercards as the anticipation of the main event grew. These days? We gotta stay strapped. Wait that was Nate Dogg, let me try again. These days, in the words of the Madd Rapper, "tell em why you mad!"
-The undercards are almost always superior fights when compared to the main event. The general rule is the less money the fighters are being paid, the better the fight. Who would you be more afraid of, a guy fighting for food or a guy fighting for a 3rd BMW? Which guy do you think is gonna be more motivated? My solution, when ever a purse for a fight is over a certain amount the winner of the fight takes all. Fuck these guys being able to just go out there for 3 rounds, fall down and get paid $5 million. Winner take all.
-$50. At least. Do you know what my cable bill is already per month? Screw you HBO I already pay for your channel so now why do I have to pay for your pay-per-view shit for 5 hours a month? That's a double dip right there. It is a bitch to everybody to throw in money for the fight and even if you do get the money it's cash. Which you will spend long before the cable bill for the fight arrives. And then you can't figure out why your cable bill is $50 higher this month. And the 3 dudes who still owe you 5 bucks? Good luck with that.
-Starts at 8 PM ET usually. Main event starts sometime between 10 -12:30. It could be 5-5 1/2 hours from start to finish. That's a long time. Typically you start drinking even before 8. Which basically means that half of the views are asleep by the end of the fight. They need to find a way to start the main event at a set time. And ideally allow you to just buy the main event portion for less dough. Good luck with that though.
-Michael Buffer. What else ya got? I'm really sick of that same damn line. You got a video game out of it even. When you do all those drops on Stern it's kill. Spread your wings you bastard.
That's enough for now. I've already talked myself out of watching this fight tomorrow. Isn't the dunk contest on anyway?
Do you realize that they still do all this boxing shit on pay-per-view? Taylor vs. Pavlik is tomorrow night and I could care less. I remember being younger and fight night was fucking fantastic. In college we'd play cards, drink, smoke cigars and watch the fight on our very inexpensive viewing box. (Read: Black Box Cable) People knew the guys fighting and who they'd fought recently. There was genuine excitement during the undercards as the anticipation of the main event grew. These days? We gotta stay strapped. Wait that was Nate Dogg, let me try again. These days, in the words of the Madd Rapper, "tell em why you mad!"
-The undercards are almost always superior fights when compared to the main event. The general rule is the less money the fighters are being paid, the better the fight. Who would you be more afraid of, a guy fighting for food or a guy fighting for a 3rd BMW? Which guy do you think is gonna be more motivated? My solution, when ever a purse for a fight is over a certain amount the winner of the fight takes all. Fuck these guys being able to just go out there for 3 rounds, fall down and get paid $5 million. Winner take all.
-$50. At least. Do you know what my cable bill is already per month? Screw you HBO I already pay for your channel so now why do I have to pay for your pay-per-view shit for 5 hours a month? That's a double dip right there. It is a bitch to everybody to throw in money for the fight and even if you do get the money it's cash. Which you will spend long before the cable bill for the fight arrives. And then you can't figure out why your cable bill is $50 higher this month. And the 3 dudes who still owe you 5 bucks? Good luck with that.
-Starts at 8 PM ET usually. Main event starts sometime between 10 -12:30. It could be 5-5 1/2 hours from start to finish. That's a long time. Typically you start drinking even before 8. Which basically means that half of the views are asleep by the end of the fight. They need to find a way to start the main event at a set time. And ideally allow you to just buy the main event portion for less dough. Good luck with that though.
-Michael Buffer. What else ya got? I'm really sick of that same damn line. You got a video game out of it even. When you do all those drops on Stern it's kill. Spread your wings you bastard.
That's enough for now. I've already talked myself out of watching this fight tomorrow. Isn't the dunk contest on anyway?
Thursday, February 14, 2008
No Tournaments 2nite
Fuckstains
Even though you'd never be able to tell by looking at their homepage, PokerStars abruptly canceled all tournaments past 7 PM ET tonight. And they stopped regenerating sit-and-go's. If you don't play online poker you probably have no clue what I am talking about. But I bought some beer and planned on spending V-Day gambling my winners from earlier in the week. Now I have to play cash games or play on another site which I haven't done in a hot minute.
Just remember don't get V.D. on V-Day.
Even though you'd never be able to tell by looking at their homepage, PokerStars abruptly canceled all tournaments past 7 PM ET tonight. And they stopped regenerating sit-and-go's. If you don't play online poker you probably have no clue what I am talking about. But I bought some beer and planned on spending V-Day gambling my winners from earlier in the week. Now I have to play cash games or play on another site which I haven't done in a hot minute.
Just remember don't get V.D. on V-Day.
The Stackhouse Connection
You know Mark Cuban was either silently shitting himself or just cursing at inanimate objects after the Lakers stole Pau Gasol and the Suns went all-in by acquiring Shaq. He's even more pissed because he wanted to be the one who stole a top player without dipping into his top 7 players. He had vowed loudly that he would not trade multiple contributors from his roster to acquire Jason Kidd or any one of his ilk. And Shaq is untradeable. I remember when Juwan Howard was untradeable and he was traded twice. Cuban traded for him and then traded him away a season later. Cuban likes making big moves, has big money and pry drives a big fuckin truck. (If you don't have a big truck you can lease one for cheap - See Funkmaster Flex - Big Truck Series Volume 3) Point being he likes big moves and he likes making them first. Jason Kidd is the biggest name left out there and he started his career in Dallas. So Cuban is pissed at the Suns and the Lakers who also happen to be two of his team's arch rivals. So fuck it, let's gut the roster.
For the record, I think this trade is a wash for Dallas. I think the thing that they'll regret most is throwing in 2 first rounders. One should have been enough. The good news is Kidd will be their emotional leader and has Finals experience. And he only has one more year left on his deal. Which means (Unless Cuban gives him an extension and the rumor a month ago was that Cuban would give him one more year @ $20 million) that next year if he didn't work out he would be an extremely valuable expiring contract for teams trying to create cap space for the free agent bonanza after the 2008-09 season. The bad news is Dallas has no depth now. They better find some unsung heroes because they just got small and shallow. But they may now have the fortitude to win a couple tough road playoff games against superior teams.
Of course this trade might not happen now. I knew that when I started writing this. But I think both teams have gone too far to abandon this deal now. But this situation was eerily familiar to me. In case you don't know the (hit the title for a link) Devean George has exercised a contractual right to veto his being included in the Kidd trade because he would have to forfeit his "Bird Rights" to do so. Simply put, Bird Rights means that if a player has been on a team for a long time even if that team is over the cap they can make a large offer to him. That's the general idea. So George is worried this will hamper his ability to ever get any deal larger than the mid-level exception ever again. This has happened before.
In the summer of 2000 the Philadelphia agreed to a four team trade that would have sent Allen Iverson and Matt Geiger to the Detroit Pistons. The trade was announced in all news media, players were packing their bags, press conferences and last interviews were being given. But then something happened. The Pistons were very close to the cap after making the trade, which they had made under the assumption that Geiger (thrown in to make salaries match) would wave his trade kicker (his salary increased 10-15% when traded) which he refused to do. So the Pistons couldn't make the deal work. And it collapsed. At the time of the trade, all parties (except Geiger) seemed happy with the deal. The fates of the Sixers and Pistons were forever altered. The Sixers were forced to rebuild on the fly around Iverson. He won the MVP award the next season and the Sixers lost to the Lakers in the Finals. (Everybody forgets the Lakers were undefeated until the Finals. The Sixers won Game 1 and lost Game 2 in overtime when Iverson was raped by Tyrone Lue) The Pistons were forced to moved in a different direction. They used their mid-level exception to sign Chauncey Billups. They traded Stackhouse for Rip Hamilton instead. The very same Stackhouse who would've gone to Philly for Iverson. The Pistons went on to draft Tayshaun Prince and trade for Rasheed Wallace. This is probably the greatest trade that never happened. I cannot see how either team would have done better had they made the trade.
Which brings us back to now. History has a real sense of symmetry. I can picture the Mavericks playing the part of the Sixers. They keep their players and instead make a deal for Jermaine O'Neal without giving up Harris or Diop. Much better deal and they get the size they need. The Pacers would probably be more than happy to dump Jamal Tinsley's contract to them if they could make the numbers work. The Nets finish the season playing hard and move Kidd and or Carter in the summer for a much better deal.
Maybe I'm full of shit. But I like both teams better if the trade didn't happen. But I think it will. But history has a funny way of repeating itself.
NOTE - I seriously tried to find a way to contact Matt Geiger for a comment but I couldn't find any contact info for the dude. I did find out that he's a pretty smart man with cash so maybe he knew what he was doing when he refused to waive his trade kicker. If you want some more reasons to hate your life and loathe professional athletes check out the links.
Hate Yourself
Kill Yourself
Surprisingly, I couldn't find any compilations of Matt Geiger's career highlights. This was the closest that I could come. Do you realize he had an almost $50 million contract and isn't even worthy of a 2 minute clip on YouTube?
For the record, I think this trade is a wash for Dallas. I think the thing that they'll regret most is throwing in 2 first rounders. One should have been enough. The good news is Kidd will be their emotional leader and has Finals experience. And he only has one more year left on his deal. Which means (Unless Cuban gives him an extension and the rumor a month ago was that Cuban would give him one more year @ $20 million) that next year if he didn't work out he would be an extremely valuable expiring contract for teams trying to create cap space for the free agent bonanza after the 2008-09 season. The bad news is Dallas has no depth now. They better find some unsung heroes because they just got small and shallow. But they may now have the fortitude to win a couple tough road playoff games against superior teams.
Of course this trade might not happen now. I knew that when I started writing this. But I think both teams have gone too far to abandon this deal now. But this situation was eerily familiar to me. In case you don't know the (hit the title for a link) Devean George has exercised a contractual right to veto his being included in the Kidd trade because he would have to forfeit his "Bird Rights" to do so. Simply put, Bird Rights means that if a player has been on a team for a long time even if that team is over the cap they can make a large offer to him. That's the general idea. So George is worried this will hamper his ability to ever get any deal larger than the mid-level exception ever again. This has happened before.
In the summer of 2000 the Philadelphia agreed to a four team trade that would have sent Allen Iverson and Matt Geiger to the Detroit Pistons. The trade was announced in all news media, players were packing their bags, press conferences and last interviews were being given. But then something happened. The Pistons were very close to the cap after making the trade, which they had made under the assumption that Geiger (thrown in to make salaries match) would wave his trade kicker (his salary increased 10-15% when traded) which he refused to do. So the Pistons couldn't make the deal work. And it collapsed. At the time of the trade, all parties (except Geiger) seemed happy with the deal. The fates of the Sixers and Pistons were forever altered. The Sixers were forced to rebuild on the fly around Iverson. He won the MVP award the next season and the Sixers lost to the Lakers in the Finals. (Everybody forgets the Lakers were undefeated until the Finals. The Sixers won Game 1 and lost Game 2 in overtime when Iverson was raped by Tyrone Lue) The Pistons were forced to moved in a different direction. They used their mid-level exception to sign Chauncey Billups. They traded Stackhouse for Rip Hamilton instead. The very same Stackhouse who would've gone to Philly for Iverson. The Pistons went on to draft Tayshaun Prince and trade for Rasheed Wallace. This is probably the greatest trade that never happened. I cannot see how either team would have done better had they made the trade.
Which brings us back to now. History has a real sense of symmetry. I can picture the Mavericks playing the part of the Sixers. They keep their players and instead make a deal for Jermaine O'Neal without giving up Harris or Diop. Much better deal and they get the size they need. The Pacers would probably be more than happy to dump Jamal Tinsley's contract to them if they could make the numbers work. The Nets finish the season playing hard and move Kidd and or Carter in the summer for a much better deal.
Maybe I'm full of shit. But I like both teams better if the trade didn't happen. But I think it will. But history has a funny way of repeating itself.
NOTE - I seriously tried to find a way to contact Matt Geiger for a comment but I couldn't find any contact info for the dude. I did find out that he's a pretty smart man with cash so maybe he knew what he was doing when he refused to waive his trade kicker. If you want some more reasons to hate your life and loathe professional athletes check out the links.
Hate Yourself
Kill Yourself
Surprisingly, I couldn't find any compilations of Matt Geiger's career highlights. This was the closest that I could come. Do you realize he had an almost $50 million contract and isn't even worthy of a 2 minute clip on YouTube?
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Iraq War continues, Clemens appears before Congress but has no intentions to bring steroids to our troops in Iraq
Michael Corleone demands an apology!
If you haven't seen a TV or listened to an AM sports-talk radio station in the past hour or two, Roger Clemens and his ex-trainer Brian McNamee are testifying live before Congress. This coverage is currently running on 7 channels simultaneously on Comcast cable. It's fucking surreal, and not like the bullshit VH-1 show that brought Flava Flav back from the dead. It's very much like a combination of a feature length Law & Order movie and the Congressional hearings scenes From Godfather (Part 2).
Clemens and McNamee are sitting at opposite ends of a long table giving each other the occasional look of death. They have a buffer zone of about a million lawyers and other jerkoffs in between them but non of the jerkoffs are even allowed to speak. These Congressmen ain't fuckin around, they're making speeches like Al Pacino at the climax of any movie he's made since 1990. They won't allow any lawyers to talk and they are demanding that their witnesses answer questions directly and immediately. No word as of yet how they are going to work commercial breaks in. Maybe Clemens has a couple timeouts or a coach's challenge flag or something.
The best part about this is that there are two best parts now that I think about it. First off, today is the day that NFL commissioner Roger Goodell is meeting PA Senator Arlen Spector on Capitol Hill regarding Spygate. Wonder if the NFL somehow set this up because nobody is covering Spygate and everybody wants to know about what drugs Roger Clemens shoots in his ass. Secondly, does anybody else find it hysterical that all of these Congressmen (and women) are all saying that they only have a couple of minutes and they have to move on because they have other urgent business. I've been on Capitol Hill. Everybody is running around but nobody is actually doing anything. These people are all probably just pissed that their 3 hour lunch was interrupted. Or they realized that a lot of people are questioning why a government of a country at war is worried about what Roger Clemens injected into his ass.
Does anybody else feel like Brian McNamee is gonna disappear soon and his wife is gonna get a "Sicilian Message"?
If you haven't seen a TV or listened to an AM sports-talk radio station in the past hour or two, Roger Clemens and his ex-trainer Brian McNamee are testifying live before Congress. This coverage is currently running on 7 channels simultaneously on Comcast cable. It's fucking surreal, and not like the bullshit VH-1 show that brought Flava Flav back from the dead. It's very much like a combination of a feature length Law & Order movie and the Congressional hearings scenes From Godfather (Part 2).
Clemens and McNamee are sitting at opposite ends of a long table giving each other the occasional look of death. They have a buffer zone of about a million lawyers and other jerkoffs in between them but non of the jerkoffs are even allowed to speak. These Congressmen ain't fuckin around, they're making speeches like Al Pacino at the climax of any movie he's made since 1990. They won't allow any lawyers to talk and they are demanding that their witnesses answer questions directly and immediately. No word as of yet how they are going to work commercial breaks in. Maybe Clemens has a couple timeouts or a coach's challenge flag or something.
The best part about this is that there are two best parts now that I think about it. First off, today is the day that NFL commissioner Roger Goodell is meeting PA Senator Arlen Spector on Capitol Hill regarding Spygate. Wonder if the NFL somehow set this up because nobody is covering Spygate and everybody wants to know about what drugs Roger Clemens shoots in his ass. Secondly, does anybody else find it hysterical that all of these Congressmen (and women) are all saying that they only have a couple of minutes and they have to move on because they have other urgent business. I've been on Capitol Hill. Everybody is running around but nobody is actually doing anything. These people are all probably just pissed that their 3 hour lunch was interrupted. Or they realized that a lot of people are questioning why a government of a country at war is worried about what Roger Clemens injected into his ass.
Does anybody else feel like Brian McNamee is gonna disappear soon and his wife is gonna get a "Sicilian Message"?
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Ottawa Who?
Thomas Vanek finally gets a hat trick
The only reason most people have heard of Thomas Vanek is because of his contract. Due to the incompetence of Darcy Regier the Buffalo Sabres had horrible offseason. They had a chance early in the season to lock up Chris Drury and Daniel Briere with 4-5 year contracts in the $25 million range. Long story short, he fucked up and the Sabres lost both of them. In the midst of all of this shit the Edmonton Oilers figured that the Sabres were not going to spend that proverbial cash. So they plotted on some shit.
Thomas Vanek was a promising young 2 year veteran. And also a restricted free agent. So the Oilers made him a Godfather offer. A huge contract which came with a $10 million salary for the upcoming 2007-08 season. Regier had warned all the GM's that he would match any offer to Vanek but the Oilers did it anyway, as was their right. Regier bitched and moaned and ultimately matched the offer.
From a Sabres fan's point of view Vanek cost more than our two captains, Drury and Briere who were the heart and soul of last seasons team. And at $10 million this season Vanek is one of the 10 highest paid players in the league. And he's been decent but not anywhere near the 10 million dollar man.
The Sabres have been struggling. But they're getting healthy. Ryan Miller is heating up. And Thomas Vanek finally got his first career hat trick. Against Ottawa. Regarded as the best team in the land, the team to beat, Ottawa. Ottawa who ended the Sabres playoff run last year.
Don't look now but the Sabres are undefeated in regulation the last nine games. They've won 16 of their last possible 18 points. See you in the playoffs Philly.
The only reason most people have heard of Thomas Vanek is because of his contract. Due to the incompetence of Darcy Regier the Buffalo Sabres had horrible offseason. They had a chance early in the season to lock up Chris Drury and Daniel Briere with 4-5 year contracts in the $25 million range. Long story short, he fucked up and the Sabres lost both of them. In the midst of all of this shit the Edmonton Oilers figured that the Sabres were not going to spend that proverbial cash. So they plotted on some shit.
Thomas Vanek was a promising young 2 year veteran. And also a restricted free agent. So the Oilers made him a Godfather offer. A huge contract which came with a $10 million salary for the upcoming 2007-08 season. Regier had warned all the GM's that he would match any offer to Vanek but the Oilers did it anyway, as was their right. Regier bitched and moaned and ultimately matched the offer.
From a Sabres fan's point of view Vanek cost more than our two captains, Drury and Briere who were the heart and soul of last seasons team. And at $10 million this season Vanek is one of the 10 highest paid players in the league. And he's been decent but not anywhere near the 10 million dollar man.
The Sabres have been struggling. But they're getting healthy. Ryan Miller is heating up. And Thomas Vanek finally got his first career hat trick. Against Ottawa. Regarded as the best team in the land, the team to beat, Ottawa. Ottawa who ended the Sabres playoff run last year.
Don't look now but the Sabres are undefeated in regulation the last nine games. They've won 16 of their last possible 18 points. See you in the playoffs Philly.
Swimsuit Issue comes out, Kleenex stock rises, Valentines Day plans get cancelled
It's not just another Tuesday
I remember being twelve years old and being unbelievably excited because the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue was coming out. I made up some story about going to somebody's house, grabbed the trusty backpack and took off on my bike. I lived in a little shitty town and there were precious few places to actually cop the issue. There was a Rite-Aid and a little corner store, 7-11 type of joint within 2 miles. And this is February in western NY and I'm 12 and on a bike and it's just about dark out. So two miles each way is quite a trip. Looking back on it I must have told my parents a helluva story for them to let me go out on my bike. Maybe they weren't home and I just left a note. Not like anybody had cell phones, GPS or anything like that. So I go to the Rite-Aid, a big fuckin chain pharmacy, mini-mart deal. I was sure they'd have it. But they didn't. I even asked the counter bitch about it (I told her my dad was in the car and sent me in to get it) and she said that the store owner was very religious so basically there was no chance on them having the magazine. So fuck.
The good news is the little corner store joint was right across the way. This was the only place that you could cop a Playboy (or the like) in town. All the good magazines were behind the counter but I was pretty sure I was legal to buy the swimsuit issue, plus I was pretty sure this guy would sell me a Playboy if I have the cash in my hand. So I park the bike and march the fuck in the store like whoa! Go up to the counter and ask the dude for the swimsuit issue. Then I heard the worst two words of my life to that point "sold out". Needless to say I was pissed.
I was cold because it was fucking cold outside. And I was sweaty because I was riding a bike around in full winter gear. I was just not happy at all. So with no options I headed home. I figured that I would take my magazine cash and go cop something to eat. Not an ideal situation but what the fuck, I was 12. How bad can life really be if you're 12 and your biggest problem is the inability to procure a copy of the new swimsuit issue. The grocery store was about halfway home so I stopped there dreaming of a microwave dinner while watching my VHS tape of late night Cinemax movies.
So I roll up in the grocery store and head for the frozen section. And then.....
if you want our hero to:
-fight Godzilla (Text GODZ to 8884625006)
-meet Rachel Hunter (Text RHUNT to 8884638019)
-die (Text HAPPYEND to 8884626666)
-find the magazine (Text BS to 8664620420)
-discover a copy of Playboy (Text HHEF to 8664635006)
Ok seriously if you actually texted anything to any of those numbers you have your own set of issues. My dictionary is telling me that "texted" is not a word. That's got to be a real word by now right? Isn't "IM'd" a word? According to this dictionary, no. How about "e-mailed"? E-mailed is ok according to the dictionary. As are fucked, fucking and shitting.
Anyway to finish the story I went in to the store and headed back to the freezer area. I rounded the corner and boom! Right in the middle of the freezer aisle was a free -standing display for the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. Complete with a life-sized cut out of the supermodel covergirl. (Damn "covergirl" isn't a word either?) I've decided to not name to covergirl for fear of dating myself and my story. Needless to say I was completely enthralled. To top it all off I found an extra $3 in my backpack so I was able to have a microwave dinner and my very own copy of the swimsuit issue.
It's safe to say that I took my first real step towards becoming a real man that day. I persevered and overcame the odds all for some tits. To this day I still find my self fighting the same battles. But on a brighter note, that copy of the swimsuit issue made me the most popular dude in sixth grade until 2 days later when everybody's Dads got their subscription copies in the mail. But for those two days I was a man amongst boys. The only man in the class with the issue with the ass. (I later tried to use this as my slogan for class president but the school did not appreciate the symmetry)
I remember being twelve years old and being unbelievably excited because the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue was coming out. I made up some story about going to somebody's house, grabbed the trusty backpack and took off on my bike. I lived in a little shitty town and there were precious few places to actually cop the issue. There was a Rite-Aid and a little corner store, 7-11 type of joint within 2 miles. And this is February in western NY and I'm 12 and on a bike and it's just about dark out. So two miles each way is quite a trip. Looking back on it I must have told my parents a helluva story for them to let me go out on my bike. Maybe they weren't home and I just left a note. Not like anybody had cell phones, GPS or anything like that. So I go to the Rite-Aid, a big fuckin chain pharmacy, mini-mart deal. I was sure they'd have it. But they didn't. I even asked the counter bitch about it (I told her my dad was in the car and sent me in to get it) and she said that the store owner was very religious so basically there was no chance on them having the magazine. So fuck.
The good news is the little corner store joint was right across the way. This was the only place that you could cop a Playboy (or the like) in town. All the good magazines were behind the counter but I was pretty sure I was legal to buy the swimsuit issue, plus I was pretty sure this guy would sell me a Playboy if I have the cash in my hand. So I park the bike and march the fuck in the store like whoa! Go up to the counter and ask the dude for the swimsuit issue. Then I heard the worst two words of my life to that point "sold out". Needless to say I was pissed.
I was cold because it was fucking cold outside. And I was sweaty because I was riding a bike around in full winter gear. I was just not happy at all. So with no options I headed home. I figured that I would take my magazine cash and go cop something to eat. Not an ideal situation but what the fuck, I was 12. How bad can life really be if you're 12 and your biggest problem is the inability to procure a copy of the new swimsuit issue. The grocery store was about halfway home so I stopped there dreaming of a microwave dinner while watching my VHS tape of late night Cinemax movies.
So I roll up in the grocery store and head for the frozen section. And then.....
if you want our hero to:
-fight Godzilla (Text GODZ to 8884625006)
-meet Rachel Hunter (Text RHUNT to 8884638019)
-die (Text HAPPYEND to 8884626666)
-find the magazine (Text BS to 8664620420)
-discover a copy of Playboy (Text HHEF to 8664635006)
Ok seriously if you actually texted anything to any of those numbers you have your own set of issues. My dictionary is telling me that "texted" is not a word. That's got to be a real word by now right? Isn't "IM'd" a word? According to this dictionary, no. How about "e-mailed"? E-mailed is ok according to the dictionary. As are fucked, fucking and shitting.
Anyway to finish the story I went in to the store and headed back to the freezer area. I rounded the corner and boom! Right in the middle of the freezer aisle was a free -standing display for the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. Complete with a life-sized cut out of the supermodel covergirl. (Damn "covergirl" isn't a word either?) I've decided to not name to covergirl for fear of dating myself and my story. Needless to say I was completely enthralled. To top it all off I found an extra $3 in my backpack so I was able to have a microwave dinner and my very own copy of the swimsuit issue.
It's safe to say that I took my first real step towards becoming a real man that day. I persevered and overcame the odds all for some tits. To this day I still find my self fighting the same battles. But on a brighter note, that copy of the swimsuit issue made me the most popular dude in sixth grade until 2 days later when everybody's Dads got their subscription copies in the mail. But for those two days I was a man amongst boys. The only man in the class with the issue with the ass. (I later tried to use this as my slogan for class president but the school did not appreciate the symmetry)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
